fettuccini alfredo at 5 am

It has been a few days since getting my wisdom teeth yanked from my face. The pain is still taking a toll on my moneymaker...i mean...my face. I'm still swollen and have the appearance of an 8 year old boy who is a collector of McDonald's happy meal toys. So today I tried again to work at the coffee shop because I need money and I hate sitting around too much. My alarm went off at 4:45 AM. I got up and realized that my face still felt as though a stampede of midgets trampled my face throughout the night. Also, I was starving and the only soft thing I could warm up quick enough to eat before leaving for work was some left-over fettuccine alfredo. I felt like Michael Scott from The Office when he tries to carboload before "racing for the cure for rabies." I do believe that is the earliest I have ever eaten pasta...but it may not be earliest to come...

Wisdom Teeth

Well my epic journey began approximately 2 weeks ago when I called Eagle Oral and Maxillofacial clinic to schedule a consultation to have my wisdom teeth yanked from my face. It was a delightful conversation with Carrie the receptionist and we scheduled the consultation and got it set up for my dentist to send my x-rays over to them.

I arrive to the consultation and to my surprise, hell broke lose that day. The waiting room in this small clinic was packed because the doctor was incredibly backed up on appointments. After waiting for quite some time, I entered the room and sat in the uncomfortable chair. After turning on C-span and pushing the button to recline myself, the doctor came in and began talking faster than I do (which is freakin' impressive) and filled me in what she was going to do in my mouth. She informed me that they barely received my x-rays a minute before the consultation, then she left, and I went to the front desk to schedule a day for surgery.

Julie, the lady at the front desk, was new and had no idea what she was doing. I told her that I wanted oral sedation pills with laughing gas, and that I did not want IV sedation because I am cheap. she said "ok" and scheduled my appointment for the next week. She also said that there was an issue with my insurance and that she would get it figured out and call me asap.

One week later....still no call from Julie. So I took initiative and called Julie several times the day before surgery and she still hadn't taken care of it. Also, Julie had to ask the first two times what I was getting done. I assured her "wisdom teeth extraction with oral sedation and laughing gas."

So after hours of Julie putting it off, she finally called me back and got the insurance figured out.

Surgery day...I arrive early as planned to take the oral sedation pills early. Julie has me sign in and then sign a waiver that explained that it was ok to have IV sedation. holy crap. So I had to tell Julie once again that I was not taking IV Sedation. "oh that's right!" she says very comfortingly. then she says that she is gonna go get the sedation pills at the hospital pharmacy...then she finds out that they have none so my mom and I have to take a trip to albertsons to get the pills ourselves. The grand total for the pills was $7.69 . . .which is weird since they were going to charge me $100 for those pills. I talked to Julie about it and she said I still have to pay $100 for them to monitor me and the whole process...I am really close to shoving the sedation pills into Julie's mouth.

So I finally take the pills and try to relax even though I feel like exploding on everyone in my path due to anger and stress. I am surprised I actually got my wisdom teeth out and not an enema or anything done to my internal organs.

so after the waiting time for the sedation pills and laughing gas to kick in...nothing, I am completely awake and am fully aware of what is going on around me...it was then that the doc decided to give me IV sedation. Me being myself said, "you aren't going to charge me for that are you?" she said no, and I fell asleep.

In the end, I am feeling ok, although I was extremely grouchy early on about the whole process. I haven't seen the bill yet, but I'm sure I will have to help them fix something on it.